Lately I’ve been hearing some chatter about NFL team-branded batteries. It began a few weeks ago when Twitter-er Shaun Meulemans posted the photo shown above and said, “This might me be the most useless NFL licensed product I’ve ever seen. You literally see the logo when you initially use it, and when you throw it away, [but] never in between.”
I saw a few other people on social media making similar comments. The kicker came two nights ago, when former Uni Watch Ticker assistant Mike Chamernik, who I usually agree with on most matters, emailed me a photo of some Bears batteries and said, “I saw these at my local grocery store. This has to be the most pointless fan merchandise.”
It may surprise you to hear that I disagree! To me, something like yet another Mets T-shirt or yet another Raiders cap is “pointless fan merchandise.” Who needs more of that? But if you’re going to be buying batteries anyway, why not have them cloaked in the colors and logos of your favorite team? Sure, you won’t see the logos very often, but so what? Personally, I’d kinda get a kick out of putting 49ers batteries in my bike radio. At first I’d feel good knowing that they were in there, and then I’d probably forget about them and there’d be a nice surprise waiting for me a few months later when it came time to swap them out. Like, I’d open up the battery compartment and go, “Oh, right, I have Niners batteries!” As long as they don’t cost more than regular batteries (which they apparently don’t), I really don’t see the problem.
Of course you can make all sorts of jokes: Giants batteries give out in the fourth quarter, Bengals batteries don’t work at all, Eagles batteries are just for throwing at people, and so on. But on the flip side, consider this: How is it possible that nobody thought of Chargers batteries until now? It’s a natural!
Sure, you could say that the larger trope of slapping sports logos on anything and everything has gotten out of hand. But frankly, given how much complete slop is out there on the sports merch landscape, I’m surprised people are singling out these relatively harmless batteries for scorn.
What do you think? Discuss.
(Footnote: Despite the name, “Extra Heavy Duty” is actually a step below alkaline in terms of battery longevity, so these NFL cells probably aren’t ideal for fancy electronic devices. But they’d be fine in your TV remote or something like that.)
Ripper reminder: In case you missed it on Tuesday, Uni Watch seam rippers are now available in yellow and white, in addition to our previous colors of green, blue, and red. (But green is temporarily out of stock. Will have more soon!) Full ordering info here.
By Lloyd Alaban
’Skins Watch: A state commission has decided that a Pennsylvania high school can keep calling its teams the Redskins but must “get rid of any logos and imagery that negatively stereotypes Native Americans” (from Chris Hickey).
Baseball News: We reported the new name for Worcester’s new minor league team yesterday. Here are the other 218 names they were considering (from @PeskysPole). … Sports-themed weddings have been a thing forever now, but this Mets wedding expo offering might take the (wedding) cake (from Andy Ouriel).
NFL News: Despite earlier reports that the Titans would wear navy over light blue on Sunday, they’ve now settled on navy over white (from Titans Uni Tracker). … The Athletic has an oral history of 2017’s “Snowvertime” game between the Colts and the Bills, where the Colts wore all white in the snow (paywalled) (from Michael Duffy). … The Bills will go mono-blue with white facemasks on Thanksgiving.
College Football News: Mono-blue for Virginia this weekend against rival Virginia Tech (from our own Jamie Rathjen). … New white helmets for Western Michigan last night (from @Cretes79). … TCU is going BFBS this week (from @TCUFIELDCREW). … Following the color film footage of the 1939 Iowa-Notre Dame game Kary Klismet found last week, here’s some more great color footage from Iowa’s game against Minnesota that same season. This footage is uni-notable not only for the Gophers’ all-gold jersey and pants combo, but the vintage homecoming lawn displays at the start. … Hawaii is the latest team in Blaise D’Sylva’s helmet history tour. … Also from Blaise: New helmets last night for NIU and Akron. … NIU DT Weston Kramer had a helmet decal malfunction last night (from @RomanPerdz). … As for NIU’s uniforms, it looks like their NOBs had inconsistent lettering (from Jim Pericotti).
Hockey News: The Utica Comets, AHL affiliate of the Canucks, will wear these Flying Skate-inspired jerseys on Feb. 29 and March 11. The jerseys will be auctioned off multiple ways following the March 11 game (from Mike Chamernik).
Basketball News: It looks like the Knicks are sticking with last season’s City uniforms for this season too (from Robert Silverman). … The Mavs’ graffiti-inspired alternates made their on-court debut last night. Here are some game photos and a few shots of the the matching court design in the flesh (from Mike Chamernik). … Mono-grey for Howard men’s last night (from Gregory Koch).
Soccer News: From Josh Hinton: Manchester United is set to sign a new advertising deal with Chinese company Haier. They’ve also revealed their training kits. … New kits for Serie A’s Juventus and AC Milan (shirt only). … 1860 Munich is going back to Nike, while Borussia Dortmund is sticking with Puma. … Dortmund has also revealed details about their third kit. … Olympique Marseille’s upcoming third kit will be inspired by the city’s strong hip-hop culture. … Switzerland is using the standard Helvetica font for Euro 2020. … Austin FC’s training kit has leaked. … So has AS Roma’s and Inter’s training kits. … International kit reveals/leaks for Montenegro, Thailand, and the Netherlands. … Tigres’s new third kit is going to be black and gold. … Mexican brand Charly released 2019-20 third kits for many of their Liga MX teams. … Adidas’s new kit is causing several teams problems. … Speaking of Adidas, here are the goalkeeper templates for Euro 2020. … Danish side Aarhus GF revealed a shirt celebrating MF Martin Jørgensen. … Keep up to date with the latest kit news, including smaller leagues around the world, by following Josh’s Twitter page. … The Scottish Cup had rainbow ribbons attached for the competition’s fourth-round draw on Sunday in recognition of England’s Rainbow Laces campaign. Scottish Premiership teams are participating this weekend, while Premier League teams might be participating in the midweek of December 3 and 4 (from our own Jamie Rathjen). … New shirt and advertiser for Bohemians (from Ed Zelaski).
Grab Bag: Great bike share logo for Auburn (from Jorge Cruz). … There are DIY projects, and there are DIY projects. This Nebraska fan makes model stadiums out of paper! If you check out his Twitter account, you’ll find a paper Wrigley Field too (from James Burke). … The city council in Warren, Mich., apparently has is own motto: “Progress Through Legislation.” Are there any other legislative bodies that have their own mottos? (From @sgtwolverine.)
Raffle results: The winner of our latest one-day raffle is Tom Asher, who’s won himself a free Uni Watch membership card. Congrats to him, and my continued thanks to David Cline for sponsoring these latest raffles.
Meanwhile, I know lots of you will be on the road or in the air today — travel safe, and watch out for that bomb cyclone. If you have the time to look at the internet (or the need to get away from your relatives), Uni Watch will continue publishing throughout the holiday weekend, beginning with some Thanksgiving thoughts from me tomorrow. See you then. — Paul