By Phil Hecken and James Huening
The long awaited “Worst. Uni. Ever.” nominees were submitted (both in last weeks comments as well as dozens of e-mails) and now, James is ready to bring you your selections in a knock-down, drag-out poll format. After receiving literally hundreds of nominees (many of them the “usual suspects” but some we never expected), James has devised the following poll, the link to which appears below. We’ve broken them down into nine categories, the winners of which will “face-off” shortly thereafter in a cage death match to find the absolute worst of the worst, as voted by you. Sounds complicated? Not really.
Simply read James’ descriptions and the pictures of your worst uniform nominees below, as broken down by category. We’ll take the top vote-getters in each category and have them all go up against one another. So with that, lets take a look at each of the nine categories, followed by the poll. James takes it from here:
In the Major League Baseball
1. First up we have the Cleveland Indians and their solid red uniforms that were worn from 1974 to 1977.
2. Next are the Houston Astros‘ beloved “Tequila Sunrise” uniforms.
3. This one’s sure to be a crowd-pleaser: the New York Yankees’ venerable pinstripes.
4. The Tampa Bay Devil Rays’ original unis.
5. The 1997-2000 Anaheim Angels.
6. Finally, the 1978 San Diego Padres.
Our next category is the National Football League
1. Our first contestant is the Buffalo Bills.
2. Joining them are the Cincinnati Bengals.
3. We go back to the dawn of the AFL for our next nominees, the original Denver Broncos uniforms, which have been on display this season as throwbacks.
4. And of course, we have the Seattle Seahawks and their new alternates.
The National Basketball Association
(NBA) is well represented:
1. Starting with the Atlanta Hawks’ 1995-99 uniforms.
2. Staying in the mid-to-late-90s, we have the Cleveland Cavaliers
3. The Detroit Pistons
4. The Houston Rockets
5. The early 90s and the Philadelphia 76ers are not to be forgotten.
6. We’ll head back to the mid/late 90s for the NBA’s two Canadian Representatives: the Toronto Raptors
7. And Vancouver Grizzlies
8. This decade is not completely off the hook, as you can see from the Washington Wizards’ recently-retired alternates.
Plenty of National Hockey League
(NHL) unis got nominated.
1. We start with the Anaheim Mighty Ducks and their whimsical “Wild Wing” alternate.
2. Staying in California, but going back farther in time, the California Golden Seals had a look that seemed as though it was inspired by UCLA football.
3. Moving to the present day, we have the Atlanta Thrashers alternate.
4. Back to California for the Los Angeles Kings and their “Burger King” jersey.
5. The Nashville Predators and their mustard-colored alternate that was worn from 2001 to 2007 are up next.
6. Next, let’s see the New York Islanders and the “Gorton’s Fisherman” jersey.
7. Back down south for the Tampa Bay Lightning and their 1996-99 alternate.
8. Our only Canadian nominee in this category is the “Flying V” of the Vancouver Canucks.
9. And rounding out this category, the Phoenix Coyotes alternate some refer to as the “Picasso” sweater.
Our next category is for Short-lived Uniforms
, whether they were intended to be permanent and scrapped after a handful of wearings or they were intended only to be worn once.
1. We’ll lead things off with the Baltimore Orioles and the orange jerseys and pants they wore for two games in 1971.
2. Joining them are the Chicago White Sox “short pajamas” that were worn in 1976. Nobody really seems to be able to agree on how many times they were worn. Most accounts have them being mothballed after a single wearing, but some say they were worn as many as four times.
3. Next up, the New York Mets and their “Mercury Mets” outfit that was worn as part of the Turn Ahead The Clock promotion in 1999.
4. The Philadelphia Phillies gave us the “Saturday Night Specials” for one game in 1979.
5. The only non-baseball nominee in this category is the Dallas Mavericks “trash bag” alternate uniform worn for a single game in 2004.
We’ll turn to the Minor Leagues
1. Starting with the American Defenders of New Hampshire whose regular uniforms feature a camouflage motif.
2. The El Paso Diablos wore yellow, pinstriped uniforms with red pillbox caps in the early 1980s.
3. Our final nominee here is the 1980 Tuscon Toros According to an account I read, the back of the jersey was turquoise.
There are way too many college teams out there to really pinpoint the worst one, so we limited things to the “big two” — NCAA Divison I
football and men’s basketball:
1. First, we’ll have a look BYU football’s 1999 redesign
2. Next up, we have Florida A&M football
3. Turning to basketball, NC State’s “leotard” experiment makes an appearance.
4. It wouldn’t be a worst uni poll without Oregon football’s “diamondplate” mix & match set.
5. We’ll close out this category with a pair of football teams dressed from head to toe (or head to knee, at least) in orange: Syracuse
6. And UTEP.
Now we head to the world of Soccer
1. First, we have the Caribous of Colorado from the NASL. Their innovative jerseys featured fringe.
2. The early days of MLS gave us the Kansas City Wiz (who later became the Wizards).
3. Our third and final soccer nominee is Team USA for their 1994 World Cup unis.
Our final category is Miscellaneous Pro Football
1. From the CFL’s south-of-the-border expansion days are the Memphis Mad Dogs.
2. The Orlando Rage represent Vince McMahon’s XFL.
3. And we’ll wrap things up with another nominee from Orlando, the 1991-92 Orlando Thunder.
Whew. There you have it. YOUR nominees for the category of “Worst. Uni. Ever.” Only one can win, but you can help narrow it down by voting in the poll below for your worst uniform in the nine categories. Once we have those nine, we’ll resubmit them to you so that we can, once and for all, determine what is the Worst. Uni. Ever.
On to the poll then: GO HERE FOR THE WORST UNIFORM EVER NOMINATIONS POLL.
Thanks again to James Huening for working on this and for coming up with the poll format. We’ll keep the nomination poll open for a week, and have the “playoffs” for the worst ever uni shortly after that. Thanks in advance for your participation!!!
~~~~~~~~~~Guess The Game From The Scoreboard:
Hokie dokie. Got a football scoreboard today, which comes from reader Billy Duss
. Not sure about the difficulty level on this one — kinda one of those “you had to be there” or have seen the game to get it. But we like that here. Definitely one to make you think about it. As always, please find a LINK to the game, which you can post down below in the comments, and not the game itself. As always, date, location and final score, if possible. Ready? Sure. Guess The Game From The Scoreboard
Our man in the street, Jim Vilk
brings you his “Top 5” Best and one WORST
college football uni matchup from yesterday:
5. Texas/Oklahoma State — A real orange bowl, eh?
4. Tulane/LSU — Green Wave a little too green, but that light blue redeems them.
3. Temple/Navy — A wise old owl didn’t need to tell me to add this to the list.
2. UCLA/Oregon State — My color palette special of the day.
1. Ole Miss/Auburn — Nothing scary about this Halloween matchup at all.
And the worst matchup of the day: San Jose State/Boise State— At least the field looked nice…
UW #1 Seahawks Fan Michael Princip
has been tracking the Oregon Ducks and all of their 2,456 possible uniform combinations this season. He’ll be updating it after each game. And what a game it was yesterday. Your #10 Ducks took the #5 Trojans behind the woodshed (are we sensing a pattern here?) and basically put a lock on the PAC-10 and punched their ticket to Pasadena…for the Rose Bowl. Look for them to really move up in the rankings now. Only disappointment was the Ducks outfits — no new carbon-steel helmets, nor black and orange (what — they’d look too much like another Oregon school?) for Hallowe’en. Anyway, Here’s Your Updated Ducktracker
. Thanks Mike!
Ah…yesterday we got to meet Mike’s cousin, Mongo. Well, today, the big guy is back with more of his unique brand of humor. Mongo’s humor that is:
Still More Mongo
Remember, Mongo only pawn in game of life.
~~~~~~~~~~Bit of a “special” treat
for you, since yesterday was Hallowe’en. Our man on the street, Jim Vilk, put together a special assemblage of Hallowe’en-inspired college football games for us that took place. Here ya go:
Happy Halloween matchups.
5. Miami, Fla./Wake Forest
3. Grambling…uh, I mean Georgia/Florida
2. S. Carolina/Tennessee
1. Coastal Carolina/Clemson
~~~~~~~~~~And finally, in case you missed it,
the Montreal Canadiens
trotted out their barberpoles
yesterday. Beauty, eh?
Good stuff there. Thanks to Jim & Rick & James & Mike and everyone else along the way. Don’t forget to vote for the WORST UNI EVER nominees. You can even post your guesses as to who you think the nine finalists will be in the comments, if you want.
And for all you uniform designers, and wanna-be designers, if you missed yesterday’s column, be sure to check it out — a chance for you to design a baseball uniform, logo and cap!
One legacy game today: Titans (Jets) versus Dolphins — should be cool to see the fish in something other than dropshadow for a change — you’ll be reminded how good they once looked, and could look again, if they wanted to make that look permanent. Game IV of the World Series tonight. Don’t forget to push your clocks back, if you haven’t already! That extra hour of sleep is so awesome, no? Of course it is.
Everyone have a great Sunday!