As many of you have heard by now, Miami will have new football uniforms next season. Naturally, it’s premature to judge a set simply on the basis of an illustration schematic, but that’s never stopped us before, so let’s take a look:
• Jerseys: The uni numbers are supposedly wider, although it’s hard to tell from the illo. The bigger issue is that handlebar piping, which looks pretty bad on the front (where you can bet that it won’t look nearly so slick and streamlined when it’s stretched over a 300-pound lineman’s torso) and totally bogus on the back. Nameplates look kinda small too, although I’ve gotta believe the type will be bigger on the actual jerseys. Meanwhile, count all the seams and panels — it’s a friggin’ crazy quilt!
• Pants: I’m gonna say it right now: I love — love — how the top stripe sort of crosses over the smaller stripe. Looks so damn cool. Did I mention that I love it? I wish the top stripes didn’t wrap all the way around to the butt cheeks, but maybe it’ll create a sort of faux belt effect — need to see it on an actual player before deciding how much to hate it. And what’s that little logo on the rear-center belt loop? Closer inspection reveals it to be the team’s secondary ibis/hurricane logo. I’m generally opposed to putting any logo in that spot (the only other example I can think of is the Rice University baseball team), but having a storm cloud emerging from the players’ butt cracks seems like a particularly bad idea, y’know?
All in all, on a scale of one to five quacks (one being relative normalcy, five being a full-on U. of Oregon nightmare), I’d rate this a fairly tame 2.5.
NBA Raffle Reminder: In case you missed it on Friday, I’m raffling off a Tracy McGrady NBA All-Star jersey. Entries are running fairly slow at the moment, so your odds of winning aren’t too shabby, at least for now. For details, scroll down to the “Yet Another Raffle” section of Friday’s entry.
Uni Watch News Ticker: The player names on the back of the North Texas State jerseys sure are big. … System of Dress undershirt sighting here (good catch by Bryan Redemske). … Fascinating note from Matt Fitzpatrick, who recently took a tour of Chase Field, the Diamondbacks’ stadium: “The tour guide said the team decided last season to add a red Sunday jersey for this year and filed the proper paperwork with MLB. The league responded by asking if the Diamondbacks would instead consider a complete overhaul and sent out a representative to make a presentation to the team. MLB wanted colors that better reflected the region, but the guide noted that Arizona merchandise sales had dropped to 29th in the league last year. He said his info came straight from the team president and he seemed pretty reliable. I know that leagues always have input but I am disturbed by the idea that they are now initiating uniform changes.” … Jeremy Brahm notes that Chunichi Dragons catcher Masaumi Shimizu wears his uni number on this throat protector. … Also from Jeremy: Amusing crackpot-ish article here about cricket team colo(u)rs. … And yet one more from Jeremy: “Hichori Morimoto has been named an ambassador for the Hokkaido Shinkansen Construction Promotion Association. So to enter the field, he wore a special bullet train hat, which matches the one shown on the Association’s home page.” … The Red Sox, who wore green jerseys for St. Patrick’s Day, plan to wear them again on April 12th as a tribute to Red Auerbach. Whatever you think of the symbolism (hmmm, Red Auerbach, Red Sox), I believe this is the first time a team has uni-memorialized someone from another sport since 2000, when the Expos wore that black “9” for Rocket Richard. … Good news from Flushing, where an inside source reports, “The Mets’ black uniforms are to be used less this season. How much less isn’t yet clear.” … Reprinted from Saturday’s comments: Good PDF article here about U. of Wisconsin’s seemingly never-ending battle against motion-W logo ripoffs. … Good article here about USC’s Ryan Francis memorial patch. … If you skip ahead about two-thirds of the way through this podcast, you’ll hear some interesting comments about uniform numbers from John Madden (with thanks to Uni Watch ukulele songstress Christine Freeman). … A few days ago there was a good discussion in the comments section about official scorers wearing zebra-striped shirts at college and high school basketball games. But Brian Temke noticed an interesting variation on this theme during the Pitt/VCU game: The scorer was wearing a zebra-striped vest. … For those sad, benighted few who might not get the reference in today’s headline, click here.